Tosa, you're experiencing what many feel when they become a "parent". You're TOTALLY responsible for another living creature, be it human or critter.
It can, at times be overwhelming for anyone. Without the support of a caring breeder, whose job it is to be there for you throught your dog's life, it's no wonder you spent time feeling overwhelmed, incapabale and that it was "all your fault" that things were not going like they do in commercials and movies! Trust me, I have taken care of children since I was FIVE.
My first born (son) had projectile vomiting and cried 22 hours of the day, EVERY day! I KNEW it HAD to be me. I HAD to be doing something wrong. Talk about crying, stress and frustration. This one I had given birth to and NOTHING I did seemed right! I finally switched pediatricians (went to MY old peditrician) because I nearly lost it after 6 weeks with no sleep and an infant the screamed around the clock, puked all over EVERYTHING and had a few other unpleassant things going on as well. Hubby worked LONG hours, leaving me trapped with this child. I found out he was allergic to the formula. It wasn't me! So see, it can happen even with your human kids and those you can't send back or (dear LORD) PTS.
Hang in there, keep up the good work and one day this will all be but a memory that you can laugh at.
pyrmom- i commend parents so much for living the hardest job of the universe. i love my parents so much that thinking about it makes me gasp for air. they have been so supportive these past few weeks, it brings so much meaning to the phrase, "you never stop being a parent, no matter how old". i appreciate you sharing your story. thank you so much!
we pray everynight before he goes to sleep. i went to the church and was able to put Holywater in an empty water bottle. we use that when we pray for understanding of one another, friendship and protection for each of us to be able to build our lives safely and happy. that really helps me. he still wets in his cage, for example he did this morning, but we slept for 7 hours, not six, and it was the first time; so what did i do.... i sighed to myself, put Coach's face close to it, said "NO, bad boy", took him outside, when he ped, i said "GOOD BOY COACH, GOOD BOY", then we ate breakfast, bathroom, 30 minutes later, bathroom again, then crate. now i am washing his bedding and gettign ready to go out for the day (well, 3 hours is my day now until i go back to work)... hopefully when i come home, or after three hours, the crate in the kitchen will be dry.
i am much calmer though. i try and remember he is a 'baby', this will happen. i just want to do the right thing when it does. i hope i did.
we are walking better. i have read a book that mentioned as a puppy it is good to have the leash tied to you (like an umbilical cord) during the day when you're home. it helps with bonding. well, it's helped with walking too.
thank you for wanting updates. i hope your pets are all doing wonderfully!
tosamom - he is adorable. i see you live in new jersey. i do also. dont know where marlton is, i am in sussex county near the delaware water gap. dont tsake this the wrong way cuz i am not one of those creeps on the internet that you need to worry about but i would be happy to meet with you and help you if it ever becomes so over whelming for you training this puppy. i would much rather help you out now while he is little and hsant picked up bad habits then when he is over a hundred pounds and more set in his ways.
as far as the urine in the crate thing. dogs dont connect their nose being put in their waste as them not supposed to be urinating in the crate. you need to catch him in the act to punish him. if you see him going in the house grab him and say no pee pee n the house and rush him outside and tell him pee pee outside. when he does act like he did the greatest thing on earth. same for poop but you can carry the poop outside with you and say poopy outside. i know it will make you feel retarded to say all this but soon you wont have to. anytime he does something wrong replace it with something he should be doing and reward him for doing it the right way. example: chew on shoes, quietly take shoes away say no shoe in a level voice and replace immedaitaley with a dog toy. when he starts chewing on the dog toy tell him he is a good boy.
scout1- i love that area you live in, sadly i am about 2 hours away, maybe 2.5. i am very close to philadelphia. marlton is about 25 minutes east of phila in a straight line.
you are so right about gettting the training now, even when i walk him now, he likes to pull and each time he does, i stop and say "no pull", then continue walking. it's tough to get anywhere b/c i keep stopping. before he wouldn't walk, now he wants to pull and pick up every leaf, stick, pine cone, peice of paper, etc. i don't know what to focus on, the walk or telling him to "leave it". if i do both, everything out of my mouth is "no pull, leave it, good boy, no pull, leave it, drop the leash (out of his mouth), good boy" he might be confused as hell!
tosamom set aside time for training walks. knowing you are no going to get anywhere. how i train for walks is I don't talk much. b/c of the exact reason you said. dogs naturally wan tot forge ahead. when they do i turn around and walk the other way. they catch on a pinch collar works great for this. now the collar should be high on the neck and should be tight enough wherre it does not slide odwn this also works well cause the 'pop' you give should not be that hard. just enough to say over here. always use that collar on walks and training nothing else. the dog will soon relate the collar to training and behaving. the dog will know i am not free to do what i want. every time you stop training take off the collar and put on a nylon or leather normal collar. the dog will realte that to I am free to do as i please (of course within reason. i have seen trainers leave the collar on a trained dog while they are chatting and there dog will be heeling, or sitting staring at them and they are not paying attention this is damaging to the training they just did. if you want the dog to pay attention they should give the respect of paying attetion back. when the dog goes to sniff or pick something up lite pops on the collar till they release is good and the reward with a treat. this is call ne po po training. negative postive positive. negative for the pops, postive when they stop, and a postive for there reward. very effective training. now back tothe pops' they do not have to be hard just lite. as hard as pulling a light switch. it may take the dog longer to catch on than yanking one good hard one on the leash. but it preserves the dogs confidence and happiness. and even after awhile you can use those small pops as activitiors. but that is months down the road. an activivator is small pop while saying the command. again as hard pulling a light cord. it is a small aversive. but that small aversive will become a powerful tool. the dog will realize it is an aversive by the reward. Even to play more that idea. give a 'good' to mark good behavior. and after a few goods give an okay and give the reward. now remeber an okay than the reward. if you give the reward while giving them an okay you will break the wanted behavior and reward something else. probably forward motion. the dog will pick up that so many goods gets them an okay and an okay gets them a reward. this will build a healthy happy well adjusted dog.
gunny, i have re-read your last msg over and over to try and absorb all of it. one question, you mentioned to get respect, give it to the dog..... can you be more specific? for example, i call coach's name and sometimes he looks and sometimes he doesn't. what do i do when he doesn't? a friend who has an akita told me to make him look at me... well, i dont want to pull on him all of the time.
as for the collar... while he is a puppy, aren't i always training him? like, if i am in the house and teaching himto come, if he doesnt have the training collar on, how am i to get through to him to come to me????? help please.....
when i call my dogs name, he doesn't always acknowledge me, i know he hears me, but i want him to look at me each time i mention his name... a friend of mine said to make him look at me, but i dont want to force it.... any ideas? treats don't always work.... thank you...
is the dog driven for toys. or games. also in the house yes you are always training. but remeber your pup is young. this is going to take time. what i mean by giving them respect is, when they have the training collar on. give them attention. there are so many fastet of training that ca be covered here. i will continue hleping you, that is not a problem but first lets work on you. the handler. the handler gets out of the dog what they put in. so if you try, you will achieve success. which i see you are very eager to learn. so we have that out of the way. a handler must be calm assertive. if you are angry, tired, lonely, fustrated, un sure I guarntee the dog will see that. dogs can read body language mre than we could ever understand. it's ther first languange. I am a firm beliver in physical touch with dogs. it works wonders. teaching a puppy to come can be easy. a thing i like to work on with dogs as young as your is building drive. buiding drive is key. first when ever that dog is training it is fun. start off by playing, no oedience, with a toy. get them all jazzed for it. then at the height of the game stop. this starves the dog for the toy. now comes the collar. time to work due nor more than 3-5 minutes of training a couple of times a day. this way the dog remebers fun.fun,fun, toy,toy,toy. a recall training game that is fun is having two people. you holding the toy and another person holding the dog. call the dog. the dog must have interest in the toy or this will not work. that reminds me the food is probably not working cause the dog is not hungry. use treats when the dog is hungrey. also provide lots of praise while he is eating. notice his mood. is it happy. only train while the dog is happy. and you alike. when the dog comes give them the toy play a wuick game of fetch or tug of war. take back the toy repeat. another good one is have a leash. sit on the floor and let the dog get distracted. call them, and pop the collar, keep popping the collar till the dog starts to approach. the minute dog appraoches stop popping, when the dog gets to you praise and reward (remeber good, good, okay) if the dog gets distracted at anytime, pop, pop, pop. (good,good, okay). does that make any sense.
never call the dog if you can't make him come. he will get wise and know the command is optional. if you know he is on his way over. give him the command while in motion (good,good,okay) praise can be enough in situatuins like these. dogs learning is more better described as conditioning. they are not like us. where we can forward think. did ever see a dog stare at door that was cracked open. they look at it like "i can't get throught that" then they bump it in fustration or by accident to find out they can open it. then from there out they know how to open a door. that is conditioning where we will go I wonder if i can open that door. so we try. that is forward thinking. did that make sense.
the dog may not fully understand his name yet. whenever there is a conflict in training like this. I give the dog the benefit. dogs are pack animals and put us to shame actually in social interaction. they want the pack to work and go as smoothly as possible. I do not believe in dog disobedience or them trying to get back at us. I think dogs are nuch more adapted to making things go smoothly and i thin you will agree when see you and your dog are communicating clearly. when trying to teach a dog his name. I wait for eye contact i do not force it. when the dog looks i say his name. and give them a good. another good one for formal obedience is "ready or "watch". hold a toy or treat the dog absolutley goes bananas for show it to them then put it behind your back. most dogs will follow and keep turning. if the dog knows sit make him sit. tell him ready or watch but play the waiting game eventually he will look up as if to say "give the treat already" imediatly give the okay. then reward. they catch on quick to this one. after awhile do it while walking let the dog walk also. this is a problem i had when i first started out the dog would do everthing in a stationary postion but nothing while walking. this is a young young dog. this is going to take awhile. we sometimes forget canines do not have the intellgence of a human mind and there learning curve is longer.