many of the times we have had it done i have asked a friend to come to my home to do it for me. i have done it for them and they returned the kindness for me. my cat got extremely car sick whenever she went in one and given her state there was no way on earth i was going to put her thru that in her last moments here. the thought of asking a friend at the time never occurred to me so i was left with myself doing it here in the house.
when it was time for our pyrenees to go there were a few factors that made my decision to do it myself. it was one of the most peaceful euthanasias i have ever witnessed. a few days later my son questioned me about my demeanor thru the whole thing. he was really curious as to how i remained so calm and didnt break down and cry during it. he thought i didnt care which was so far from the truth. i had to explain to him that in order to keep my focus and not break down i had to put myself in the same mental state i have to when dealing with this at work. there have been times at work where i have broken down during or after a euthanasia. i couldnt afford myself that this time as everything had to go right. i couldnt become an emotional wreck when prinny needed me and i couldnt allow the possibility of my emotional state screwing something up. i had my chance to grieve afterwards when we brought her to the pet cemetary to have her individually cremated. they allowed us time to say our last good byes and that was when i broke down. i hope my son understood but he was only 9 at the time.
it is a very tough thing to go thru heff and i am soirry you even have to think about it right now =(
Heff, I feel for you because we are both going through the same thing right now with our kitties (almost). Last June, I had my Rottweiler Harley pts, he also had cancer. That was the first time that I had to assist one of my animals in dying. You are right that some people just cannot face doing that. It is one of the hardest things I ever had to do. I started another post like yours yesterday but it was about how we know it's the right thing to do and yet, why is it soooo hard to do? You posted on it. I had Harley pts in my home on his bed. I held him in my arms while they did it. It wasn't the horrible experience that I had expected. Afterwards, I knew I did the right thing and I even felt such a relief because it was overwith. He wasn't suffering anymore and I was the last thing he ever saw before he died. I just want to tell you that I dread it too. But I want you to know that it's not as aweful as you might expect. Remember that they are basically letting an animal go to sleep the same way they would if they were going to operate on it. It's so peaceful for them. If you should regret not being there, you could have guilt about it forever. If you are there, you'll probably feel relieved and proud that you had the nerve to be there for your kitty. I'm not trying to put pressure on you. You should do whatever feels right for you. I just don't want you to have guilt over not being there because that is something you can never undo. And if you choose not to be there because it's just too hard, kitty will still go to sleep peacefully. There is NO wrong decision.
***Edited By: MOLLYSMOM on 5/11/2005 9:52:37 AM*** Reason: *
Some people just don't want that the be the last memoery of them. There is no wrong decision and I'm tired of hearing I should to be there. I do plan to be there. I don't like to cry in front of anyone but my boyfriend. I hope he can come with us, because I know I'll feel weird without him there. It's hard to explain, I shouldn't have a problem crying in front of family. I doubt my mom would be there, she just couldn't do it last time her cat was put down. My dad took him. I totally understand and I'm not going to condemn her for it. Dad told me when we decide to have her pts, he'll take her but I'm not leaving my baby alone....='(
Hi! I am so sorry about your cat. That is one of the hardest things to do. I stay with my pets but if you can't handle that then don't do it. I was with my husband when he died and it is some thing you with never forget. It is always a comfort for the pet to have their owner there but if you can't handle it then don't stay with her. If you do you will never forget it and that can drive you crazy. Do what your heart tells you. I am really sorry! Good Bye!
I think it depends on how you feel about it. I know a lot of animals want to go off alone and die so I don't think they really care if we are there. They know we loved them. I haven't had a pet die for a long time and I can't say if I would go in or not. Our last family lab got pts when I was only like ten and I just remember my dad being upset for days. I think he went in when they did it and I don't think it was good for him. We had a cat we pulled out of the fan belt put to sleep but the vet just came out in the lobby. I don't really remember much about that though.
I think its a personal choice. I used to work for a vet and we PTS horses, and THAT is never pretty or easy, it can be downright dangerous. Most owners dont stay for that one, but I cried right along with the ones that did.
I have always been there. I feel I owe it to MYpets to be there. I want them to feel me and hear me whispering in their ears until they are at peace.
I always felt bad when owners would drop off their pets for euth. I know THEY felt bad, crying as they left, their pets wagging their tails, confused they were left behind.
I treated all those pets with the dignity and kindness I could as I held them before they were PTS. I treated them like they were my own.
Its hard either way, but nothing to beat yourself up over. We techs in the back took good care of your Furbabys, so if you cant stay, you neednt fret about it.
Over the years we have had to put down more than a few pets, dogs, cats and horses. I have been with each and every one of them as they were moving on to the field just this side of the rainbow bridge. My wife could not stay in the room when it was actually happening, she stayed in the waiting room and then came back in when it was over. I stayed and held each and every one of them. I could not let them move on not knowing that we were there for them right till the end, just me and my being able to live with myself after i supose. We have also had a couple that have passed on their own.
You will beat yourself up after either way, "did i do the right thing and do they understand? or "maybe if we went to the vet yesterday they would be with us just one more day". Don't do it. They know you have given them the best life possible. Live with the good memories and if you beat yourself up you will deprive yourself of those memories.
just my opinion on this issue: i really think it's the individual persons choice. i mean i can see this from both sides. i can see why some people wouldn't want to be there. i've never had to have an animal pts, but i can't imagine it being something easy to do, nevermind sit through. for some people it could just be too much.
my aunt just had to have her GSD pts because she had a stroke and her entire backside was no longer functioning. she took her 2 oldest of 6 children with her. my aunt and the 14 yr old stayed in the room with her, but my 19 yr old cousin left. he kissed her goodbye and had to leave the room....he couldn't stay in there.
me personally, if and when the time comes for any of my babies i'm going to be there, and nothings going to stop me. i know it's going to be hard, but it's my choice to be there no matter what.
When my rottweiler had to be PTS, I couldn't be in the same room. I am not a bad person or a bad pet owner. I tried to stay in the room but it was just to hard on me. It was bad enough to deal with the fact of taking her to the emergency vet and being told that she was dying and there was nothing that could be done. I also didn't want to take her home and let her suffer. We took her in the first place because she was having a hard time breathing. It was very heartbreaking for both my husband and I to hear that we wouldn't be taking her home - that her life would be ending right then and there.
Those who feel that what I chose to do was wrong - that's fine. People deal with things differently. I don't think I need to explain myself anymore than what I posted.
The first pet I put down was my dog heidi, she was my childhood dog.I put her down when I was around 20 something, I basically burst into tears and ran out and all the way home. So I didn't stay, heidi was at my work all the time and new the Dr's and staff well, so she would not have been afraid or anxious. But later on I was angry about leaveing her for someone else to do. From then on I held all the others when I put them down. I usually make a quick decision and just do it, becuse if I think about it to long I stall and make excuses. I feel very sorry for those pets that are dropped off by their owners for Euthanasia, and they act like they are delivering a package or something. I guess they could be very well upset and choose to save there feelings for later. My dad died a few years ago and when we were in the emergency room and the Dr. was telling us he had passed on, I didn't bat an eye lash.It really didn't hit me till much later.
Here is a viable solution. Go in the room hold your pet, and have your vet give it a shot of propofol, a presurgical anesthetic. Your pet will fall peacefully asleep, but will be very much alive. After your pet is asleep, you can leave the room. Your beloved pets last conscious moments will be with you, and you are spared the physical and emtional pain of the final moment. Most vets will agree to do this for you. I'm so sorry. It never gets easier...*sigh*