Cocker - I understand what you're saying... that you didn't MEAN to sound rude. Let me explain it a different way...
I have a son, he's dyslexic. He has an incredibly difficult time in school. I belong to a message board for teachers and parents - it's a brainstorming message board for new ways to teach kids. If my son came home one day with an F on his report card, crying because once again he had done his best and was trying to do everything he could - and I went and posted on the MB and had a response that said: "When he gets older he won't be able to do anything if he can't read - you should probably start preparing him for a vocation that doesn't require reading :)" How do you think I would take that? Well - I'll tell you, it has happened. And I got mad. My heart breaks when my son is hurting, and while someone may have been giving me "their version" of the "harsh truth" - it certainly wasn't what I needed to hear. Nor is it what I am resigned to.
Same goes with LOR - her baby is hurting. Her baby has a problem that she has been unable to solve. She feels helpless, she feels sad and your post basically said, "Give up on trying to save his hearing... teach him hand signals". Had you said, "I know that you'll try everything that you can to stop the ear infections and I sincerely hope that you'll find the culprit - I'd like to suggest that you might want to teach him hand signals, while he's young - just in case he loses his hearing as he gets older... I've had a dog that went deaf and it's really hard to teach them once they start losing their hearing" - it would have sounded less-harsh, more helpful and come across a lot more empathetic. Does that make sense?
"i would start eaching hand signals if you arent already doing that. :) "
I'm going out on the limb, here, with heather. I also didn't see anything rude about the smiley. It was put after suggesting teaching hand signals, which is what cocker has done with her dogs. It wasn't-oh, your dog is going deaf, ha ha.
And what is wrong with suggesting that as a possibility? Sure, we all hope that it's wrong. But isn't it better to hope for the best, and be prepared for the worst? I would certainly rather that someone, especially someone who has actually been thru a situation, give me suggestions as to how to handle it if it should happen, then just turn a blind eye. It's not like, if you ignore a situation, it's going to go away. Better to be prepared for all possibilities.
Just remember, the more knowledge you (and your dog) have, the better. You may never need the hand signals, but I would rather teach my dog hand signals, and never have to use it, than ignore the possibility, and wish I would have done it.
Yes I understand that Pope.I guess I will remove the smiley.I did apologize.
Danemom,I was talking about my 10 year old cocker that I got when he was 9.He was already nearly deaf and it was harder to train him then it is younger deaf dogs.Im sorry I offened you also.Not my intent.But dont you think it would be easier to train him now instead of later.I know with my old boy I would have to tap him on the butt sometimes to get his attention.
Thank You Sonjavon,that makes me see it better.Although she knows now that i didnt mean it that way and still is offended.Im sorry about our son,my sister had ADD and dyslexia....kids can be really cruel
***Edited By: cockerlover on 1/7/2007 5:54:16 PM*** Reason: add
When apologizing you don't continue to say someone has their panties in a knot. That is not apologizing. So no, you didn't. I was not rude with you, I didn't even get mad. Just told you it was tacky. I don't care that you suggested he may go deaf, I've considered that and I am already aware of that. The way you stated it was NOT nice, no matter what anyone tries to say, it was rude.
***Edited By: thelifeofriley on 1/7/2007 5:53:36 PM*** Reason: add
I feel like I am not getting anywhere. Am I not explaining things clearly? cocker, I did not mean for you to edit your posts and I was explaining to you that your hostility makes your apology seem forced.
I will also point out that it does not appear that thelifeofriley was upset by the suggestion of hearing loss, because she said so herself before cocker ever did in the post above the post in question.
I will also say that we should drop it now since this thread is full of great advice and about Riley. It's useless, or so it seems to keep explaining ourselves when we are getting absolutely nowhere.
***Edited By: pope1982 on 1/7/2007 6:04:21 PM*** Reason: spelling
St~true, I think they recommend too many antibiotics.
Well I taught Riley hand signals before voice. You kind of lure the dogs into say a sit, then put the hand signal to it, and treat. Or you lead them into a down, use the hand signal, then treat. (Then I started added words to it after he had the hand signals down)
LOR -thanks - I'm going to have to work on those with Quincy - at 11 I'm having a hard time telling whether his hearing loss is "selective" or physical... but nevertheless -I'd like him to learn how to respond to hand commands.
Oh right, cause all of the 6 year olds I have ever met, talk things out....
I thought 6 year olds followed people they didn't like around only to constantly belittle them, then got defensive when others point it out saying they would go back to ignoring them because it isn't worth it instead of just shutting their mouth and moving along, carrying out their threat.
I guess I know 6 year old better then I thought.
***Edited By: pope1982 on 1/7/2007 6:08:25 PM*** Reason: ...
Sonjavon,my sister learned that from adults also.She has been homeschooled most the time now because of it.We go to a tiny private school now and the kids have accepted her like family.I know she had one teacher that absolutely picked on her.one day i went to pick her up from class and her teacher was making fun of her INFRONT of everyone and that is one of the very few times I was a rude,little snot to an adult! I was lucky I didnt go to school there or I would have been expelled.lol
My boy didnt know anthing when I got him.I had to tap his butt and make a "hook" like signal while I was doing it.So sometimes I would either tap his butt or the signal.For lay I would tap the floor and lay my hand down flat.With come I took my whole arm and brought it into me and I would step forward and that would make him come to me.Stay i would tell him a command and put my palm flat infront of his nose.Another thing that was hard for me to train him was because i couldnt use treats.....he would not pay attention with food around and he started to drool,,,,same hwen female dogs came around.....quite nasty lol
"But dont you think it would be easier to train him now instead of later.I know with my old boy I would have to tap him on the butt sometimes to get his attention."
No I don't think it would any easier now than later. You can teach old dogs new tricks. I actually think my deafies of any age have learned faster than the hearing ones. They have much less distractions. The oldest I have trained was a deaf and blind boy that came into rescue at 9 (old for a dane) after being tied to tree all his life. With in a month he was a normal part of the family and had his basic obedience down.
And of course you would have to tap your boy to get his attention, that had nothing to do with his age, he couldn't hear. I tap/poke (gently) mine all the time if their not looking at me and if they’re to far away I hit the floor really hard so they feel the vibration.
Sonja, while I appreciate your explanation, I must disagree. I AM dyslexic and have never used that as an excuse for anything and I have never allowed it to hold me back from what I want. Nor do I allow others to use my dyslexia as an excuse. Being dyslexic does not mean you can not read, I love to read and read up to 4 books a week. Dyslexia is not a badge I wear on my forehead, and unless I tell people so, no one has ever guessed that I am dyslexic. I don't really see how the story of your son being dyslexic and some idiot saying he can't read so prepare him for a job that doesn't require him to do so, relates to the possibility that riley will someday lose all or part of his hearing. I personally have never heard anyone suggest that I can not read so my choice in jobs will be limited. Even if someone had said it, I wouldn't be offended at all, I'd take it as a compliment that I, even having a learning disability, am smarter than that so-called "normal" person! I don't expect or allow people to pamper me because of my special needs. Its a fact of life, I've dealt with it and have moved on.
Through everyone's explanations, I still can't see how cockerlovers response was rude. It looks to me like LOR is throwing a pity party for herself, and being a drama queen trying to attract attention. I'm sorry to be harsh and blunt, but Ashley, if your dog continues to have ear infections, THERE IS A HIGH TENDENCY FOR HIM TO SUFFER HEARING LOSS, PARTIAL OR FULL! Get that through your head, deal with it and move on!
Why is cockerlover the one that is changing his/her posts and apologizing, when she was only doing what this forum is intended to do...people post a question with the expectation of getting other people's opinions and real life experience relating to the original question. Cockerlover did just that, gave her real life experience relating to owning and training a deaf dog! So to cockerlover, thank you! That was great advice! Although I don't need that advice as my dog already knows hand signals for other reasons, it was still great advice to someone that is potentially facing having a deaf dog of their own. I apologize that that person responded to you so rudely and was so unappreciative of your advice and experience!
And then I believe it was mafia that jumped on and started accusing cockerlover of following LOR around and being rude to her. I don't know how true that is, as I don't come on here much anymore cuz I can't stand this type of childishness, BUT, I do recall LOR doing this SAME thing that mafia is accusing cockerlover of doing to her friend LOR. Does sienna ring a bell? Oh yeah, and Sienna was called immature too by LOR. And again, Sienna apologized over and over and over and over and over and over again, but LOR couldn't let that go! She kept harassing sienna about a mistake that sienna made a long long time ago. Just like cockerlover did, apologized when she didn't need to, twice now, but rather than accepting the apology and letting it go, like a real live adult would do, LOR keeps it going..."well YOU did this" and "YOU did that!" And now she's bringing up a past with catlover? Now who's immature?
Heather - I too am dyslexic - and my point is exactly the point that you made... I don't expect that my son is going to have to settle for any kind of position other than one he chooses. I don't expect him to settle for anything because he is extremely intelligent, furthermore - I won't allow him to settle. But you see, I have had many people tell me that "some people just can't learn", and "not everyone was meant for greatness"... I am on the teachers message board to help teachers and other parents understand that through alternative methods of teaching they can help kids like my son learn - not to be discouraged. Yes, I am an intelligent human being and DO understand what can happen if he does not receive a good education. I'm glad that you've never been told that you have to settle... but my son at 9 years old has already been told that "not everyone is smart" and that he "needs to apply himself more" (after he spent 7 hours doing homework).
The correlation that I was making was that Riley also KNOWS what can happen - but she came here for ideas to PREVENT that from happening. It was also to explain that when you're a parent (whether it be of a child or a dog) and you're already dealing with the pain of your baby and desperate for help - having someone tell you "he's probably going to lose his hearing anyway..." really, really hurts.