Last week, I went to the Nurse Practitioner for a well woman check-up. I have had a hysterectomy--oh a decade ago, for a big fibroid I nick named the alien. I kept my ovaries. So, as I like to say, I would have PMS and not know when to stop! The nurse looked at my labs and blurted "you are no longer ovulating." I burst into tears. Well, dam, I think I knew that. I have been hot flashing so bad I would have the AC on full blast in my car when it's been 30* out. I open the freezer, stand on tip toe and put my boobs in it. Our heat bill has dropped, as my body's thermostat has risen. Why am I crying? Am I crazy? I told her I no longer felt sexy. My libido is gone. I told her my husband is twice the man I married 25+ years ago, weighing in at about 300#. Maybe it's his fault. She offered me hormone replacement therapy! I declined. I'll get through this!

The next day, I went to a lawyer to discuss writing a will. Terribly irresponsible of us not to have one. We talked about what ifs--what if our daughter predeceased us and had children, would we want the kids to get her third or her husband. Who do we want to pull the plug? etc. At least I liked the lawyer. He had dogs and old horses and three kids too.

The next day I went to a memorial service for a friend's mom. Golly, my friend's parents are passing away now.

Then--I had been cleaning the basement--like big time. My husband has a wood shop down there and it was GROSS. I used the shop vac for 6 days sucking up saw dust, nails, spiders and dead bugs, bits of yucky junk and nastiness. My husband went down there and dumped the vacum's contents in the yard, three feet from the door. What the ****. That did it. I was outraged.

Well, there you go. Any ladies out there that have gone through, or are going through "the change" out there that would like to offer some advise or share their stories---please! HELP!

Actually, the hormone therapy is great for a lot of people. My boss has been on an over the counter soy hormone replacement. I wouldn't use the real stuff, I love horses to much. If you want to try it, I can get the name for you. She loves it.

Sorry you had a week from he*l

You're probably 5 years ahead of me. *sigh* Can't wait.

Sorry to hear about the week you had. Chances are, this one will be different. (Maybe not better, but different.)

Thanx for letting me vent!! This week is better!! I am going to California with my mom to visit a favorite aunt. She is a doll---80 years old and 5 foot tall. A little dynamo!! She is Greek and loves to cook! She lost her husband last spring, my mom's brother. This will be my second visit since he passed. So it will be good therapy! Menopausal relief! and a change of scenery!

Sorry about your crappy week Razz. Do you do any regular exercise program? Perhaps that would help you, and if you could get your husband enthused enough, it would do him a lot of good too. I hope your trip gives you some relief, and that you have a really nice visit.

Awww, thanx Pen! I was trying to be funny here talking about hot flashes! They are real, and who ever named them did a great job--it is like a big ol' flash of heat coming from the inside out. I have always been one of those cold blooded women--cold hands and feet, heat on 75*!! Not any more!!

I consider myself active. I don't sit around a lot. I walk my dogs around our property almost daily. I garden--gorilla style--hauling rocks and compost and digging big holes! But, no, I don't go to the gym! Other people's sweat grosses me out.

Can you believe people blame me because my husband is obese??!! "well, if you would just cook...." Give me a break! I do not control what the man eats, his portion size or the fact that he is way more sedentary than me, preferring the couch and the remote to a day's work in the garden! He knows all the fast food menus! This is not my fault! Here I go, ranting and raving again!

Illusion--is that the cream you rub on your skin--like your upper arm?? If so I think I've heard of it, but never tried it.

I have to tell the truth, I laughed my A#S off when I read your post, and again just now. I know what you mean when you say people will critisize you for something that's totally beyond your control. My mother-in law blamed me for 2 of my boys peeing their pants accidentally, when they were 3 or 4.
I was just trying to suggest something that might help you!! Sounds like you do all the right things already, and will maybe find some relief in a herbal preparation, or hormone therepy, if you just can't hack it anymore.
I'm not there yet, but I remember when my mother went through menopause. She was a raving bloody lunatic for about 4 years.
I really hope I'm not going to take after her. I guess the other advice I would give you is to go easy on yourself, treat yourself to massages, and spas, hair do's and pedicures, etc. (if you like that sort of thing) Your holiday with your aunt will be just the ticket too, and maybe she will have some wisdom for you. Have a great trip, and I'll be hoping you feel better soon.

A raving bloody lunatic, lol!! I'll ask my dear husband if I'm that bad!!

"a holiday" with my aunt...are you in the UK? I have a British son-in-law--and he talks like this too!

Good eye Razz, I was born and raised in England lol! From my teenage eyes my mother did seem to be crazy, but as you know teenagers exaggerate everything. I really hope I don't have the type of mood swings and fits of rage that she had. I think a lot depends on your personality in the first place, and my mother was and is slightly off her rocker. I seem to take after my father, so there's a slight gleam of a ray of hope!! Anyway, keep us posted,
as I know there are many ladies on this forum who are in the same spot, or have already gone through, or are about to hit menopause.
((hugs))

I've been to London twice now. The first time was to visit my daughter who was "studying abroad". Come to find out, she was falling in love with Jason!! The second time was to attend an engagement party with all of Jason's family and friends. On that visit, we went to England's beautiful lake district where Beatrice Potter lived and wrote. Funny--I'm from Catholic stock and married a southern Baptist dude, now my daughter is married to a British Jew!! We love him to pieces...he makes my daughter so very happy. Thank God they chose to live here! Do you still have a bit of your British accent? I love it--I can already see Jason's waning a little. When we visit with his parents--who have been over three or four times now-I can't understand a word they say! Is this English--they talk fast and I keep saying "what?". What part of England are you from?

My mom is a tad crazy too! They older she gets..the worse it is getting. Guilt is huge with her. "I hardly ever see you." "If you didn't live soooo far away." I know if I call her, I should have at least an hour to talk, and I feel I must call everyday. We will see how 5 days in California goes!!