i am just curious if anyone has ever left a relationship, lonnnng term because your spouse did not like your new pet(s). my hubby for the most part seems to like our dogs but at times he get so angry and frustrated with them with the gates up, having to find a pet sitter when he wants to go out of town, complaining about the inconveince of them, etc.. then he comes home in the evenings and they jump in his lap and he seems to rather enjy it. i dunno but it cornfuses me! i feel like leaving him when he acts that way, grrrrr.
my b/f can get cranky about it sometimes too, then i remind him of all the things i put up with because of his daughter- and i am NOT a kid person at all. then i point to the door (I own the house). he shuts up.
Your dogs are just puppies, right? When they grow up and get out of the 'puppy' stage it will calm down a lot at your house. My german shepherd Abby used to be crazy wild-jumping on people when they came in the door, biting pant legs, etc. But we had her spayed and that helped to calm her down and then she just kind of grew out of it as she got older. Now she still jumps when people come in but she calms down sooner. I would not leave your husband over your dogs. Are you sure there is not an underlying issue there besides the dogs? No offense. I would just continue to work on obedience with the dogs and it will pay off in the end. You will have loving loyal companions and you'll still have your husband. As for the whole finding a pet sitter when you go out of town-I would just tell the husband that he knew of that responsibility when yous guys got the dogs, it's not the dogs' faults. Good Luck =0) **Kris, Abby, Ace & Summer
I dated my husband for 4 years before we got married, and we will be married for 4 years on March 4th. I truly think he is my other half (gag I know..hehe) but I really respect his opinions, and if something bothered him I would definately take his feelings into consideration and maybe compromise. I am lucky because he loves animals and doesn't care what I buy or own as long as I take care of them. If I came home with a puppy, he could care less. But if he had serious issues with a pet I owned, and it was a warranted complaint (like if the dog bit the kids or something) and he wanted to get rid of the dog, I would probably do it because my kids come first and if the dog was cause for serious concern for him, I don't think that's fair to him to have to put up with something that serious. If it was something like, 'the dog sheds too much, we should get rid of it' I would explain to him how much I love the pet and that I will vacuum more, but that I don't think that's a valid reason to get rid of a dog. So I think there's a fine line. Is their complaint valid, or is there something that you can do about it? I know my husband would never ask me to give up a pet unless there was a serious valid reason involved.
i broke up with a guy who i had been dating for years because he was not an animal person. my husband is an animal person so i don't really have any concerns about that. but yes if something happened, and the choice was the dog, cat or him, then i would choose the animal, without a second thought.
I divorced my second husband because he was jealous of my Australian Shepherd and my daughter. One Fourth of July he left the gate open on purpose so my dog could get out. He knew she was afraid of fireworks. I spent a day and a half looking for her until I found her. So one day when he was at work, I got a moving truck, packed up all my stuff, and left. My Husband I have now complains at times. There was a time when I have 5 rescued dogs and 3 cats. Now we have only 2 dogs and 3 cats. He knows better to complain too much because he knows he can become a "statistic" also.
I wouldn't leave my husband because of my pets either. If I was single and dating, and a guy didn't like my Toby then the guy would have to go. AT that point they are dispensable. Being married is a whole different story. You have made a commitment to someone and you need to work it out. But maybe I'm lucky, my hubby loves Toby. We got him after we were married. We don't always agree on how he should be trained and what we think should be expected from him, but that's what marriage is all about. Compromise.
I couldn't give up my husband or my pets! Fortunately, it's not an issue. Right now, we only have cats, but he spoils them more than I do! He even forgave Furface for jumping on his head while he was in the shower! (we lived in an apartment at the time, and the toilet was next to the tub. She got on the toilet tank, took a flying leap over the shower curtain, and landed on his head! I don't know who was more surprised!) And even with us getting a dog, he says it's up to me. He managed to talk me out of a scenthound, and said retriever or pointer. But other than that, he said it's up to me! As for feeding and cleaning-whoever gets up 1st feeds, and whoever finds spitup, cleans. It's not my job or his job. Well, ok...kitty litter is my job!
Wendy ditto to everything you said. A b/f is one thing,but a hubby is a commitment that the both of you made for life.You both need to sit down and talk over your differences. I would never leave my hubby over a animal,we do have differences on training issues. We talk and work them out(somtimes).
Well, I divorced my ex husband for reasons that had nothing to do with animals. Like, he was a JERK. Actually he treated our dogs better than our kids. But, I got custody of the kids and the dogs. HA! I know that's different, it wasn't because of the dogs, but I just thought I would throw it in there. :)
Thanks Ace, and ummm........to your proposal........does that mean I get Ace and Lil' Miss Summer too? Well then, yes of course. I DO!!! LOL!! I am feeling rather blue because hubby is out of town and I miss him. If he had been in town, I might have had a different response to that question. Just kidding. LOL!!!
nowadays with all the pet-custody fights popping up in the news, it seems this should be an issue people discuss before marriage, like kids, where to live, etc. i have already told my bf that i will take him to court to keep the dogs if we break up. he thinks i am joking- i am not. and i'm with gina- i divorced my 1st husband becasue he was a slacker. plain and simple. and i kept the apt and the cat, and all his furniture. new bf isnt a cat person, so i told him he could learn to be a cat person or find somewhere else to live. now he is a cat person. it's a different ballgame, like wend said, what you had 'pre-man' vs what you acquire 'post-man'. like mr not a cat person. i didnt much care when we were dating, but it was a golden rule if he was going to be living with me- treat kitty well or your stuff will be on the porch. lol @ moving out while he was at work!!! i couldn't get my ex out- i had to rent a truck, pack it, drive it to his house to get him out. can you say s-l-a-c-k-e-r!!! well worth the rental fee!
Huntersmom, wendy, catlover, rednosered.. and I'm sure other women out there, I'm glad you put your marriage before your pets. Before your kids would be a different story. Kittys Mom, you scare me! "I tell folk that I can smack them, and lock them in cages and not make the 5 o'clock news". I hope you are kidding. My wife and I fight over our dogs at times, but usually about which pup to keep, show, studs, etc. ltlgto
Agree w/ cricketmom - love me, love my dog. Now that I'm single again (about a week and a half~go me!) that is my complete mantra. Ex-F gave Minnie to me, but I had the full brunt of training, cleaning, walking. It was a "hassle" for him. What's that, reason number 1 million?
yes cricketmom, i would. i most likely would never get involved with a person who wasn't as nuts over animals as i am in the first place, but if it came down to it, he'd be gone before any of my pets. that is just me. i am an animal person. they are my life.
Scout..............I agree with you, and disagree with ltlgto to an extent for the first time. I just think living with a man that did not like dogs, would not be a person that I liked for other reasons as well, because I think the two would go hand in hand. I think I would know other things about him that I didn't like long before I found out he didn't like dogs, so I wouldn't be living with him in the first place. ltlgto................If you say anything mean to me, I will go let the air out of Timothy's tires.