I have 2 females one is 2 the other is 10 months old. It not that they fight, it just they co-exist, its like if one cat is next to you the other stays across the room, no fights just avoided hissing. It hasn't been short term either this has been going on since last april. My older cat now gets so angry now she spends her life as a hermit under the bed only coming out to eat. Its gotten that bad for me nothing I do gets her to come out she was an out going cat purring, kissing, playing, greeting people now she just hides and doesn't want to play. I know it is the other cat that is her problem because I recently took her to my parents house for a holiday break for a couple of weeks and she was her old self. I brought her back home and she was angry recluces again. She isnt a biter or scatcher, her ears just go flat and she growls until you put her back. I just want her happy. I love both of this cats but its been almost a year and I'm worried about this now. I don't want to give anyone away. I forgot before I had the 10 month old I had a roomate who had a cat and my older one was fine they were friends.
You would probably have done better in choosing a male cat. Many times the same sex do not get along. It sounds like your older cat has made up her mind about this one. Is it a possiblity that a member of your family would take the young female (Iknow you don't want to get rid of her) it has been unusually long for this to be going on, I usually give it about 3 -4 weeks, but this is a long time. I wonder what would happen if you rubbed cat mint all over the kitten! I'm reaching now!Good luck, and let us know what you end up doing.
I have had a similar issue with my opposite sex cats. My older cat is male, he was about 3 years old when I got another male, the older one was not particulary happy about the new accusition but got used to him quickly; then several years later I got a female cat and my oldest male who used to very spoiled and loving cat, always sitting on my lap and sleeping with me on my bed, simply got nuts: he started hissing, running away and behaiving very unpleasantly to put it mildly. After about 2 years he finally accepted the existence of young female but never became that loving nice cat again, though definitely got much better. It took a lot of patience on my part, though at first I was going crazy along with the cat. My advice is: have a lot of patience and try to spend as much time along with the cat that is not happy as possible.
i've had good luck with all three of my boy kitties.. they have all been super super nice fixed or not... and great with kids... we give them baths regularly and they do great... though they dont like it.. they are calm... as far as cutting their nails, they are angels.. they dont seem to mind being handled by adults or children.. and they get along great with my lil weiner dog... now, my friend has a female kitten.. and she is a basket case... it took five of us to hold her tiny body down to cut her nails... and she is soooooo mean.. my recommendation is get a boy kitty... i have one thats fixed and one that isnt... neither have sprayed.. but if you have a problem with that your local spca shelter will do it by appointment only for about 20 bucks or so... happy kitty shopping!! :)
I have experienced one occasion where an established female cat did not like a new cat until after I got the new kitty spayed. That is not saying though that having her spayed is what actually stopped the unpleasantness. I had the new girl for about 4 weeks, and when I brought her home from the vet, still all sleepy and dazed, the other cat sniffed at her, then started licking her. They were friends ever since. Infact I re-homed them to the same place.
But, again, there's no way to prove that the spaying had anything to do with the other kitty deciding that she was okay. I could have been a total coincidence.
I like most cats better than I like most people. I'll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter.
What you need to do first is to get the kitten fixed. This has a lot to do with aggression between the 2 girls. Female cats are just like lion females, they need to establish who the queen is, and with one not being fixed her will, scent and boldness is so much stronger than the one that is fixed. Then when you get the kitten home, separate them for a good week, take face cloth, wipe the older cat with it and then wipe the kitten with the same cloth, and then reverse it, do this few times per day, and for a week(cats dont recognize each other by looking at the other one but by smell). Let them sniff each other under the door, but dont let them see each other. After a week let the kitten out, but pay no attention to her at all, just baby your older cat ( this will reprogram them, and put the younger cat in a lower place than your older one). The younger cat has stronger will which you need to put her in her place. Dont pay attention to the kitten for oh about a week, act like she is not even there (no play, dont look at her, dont TOUCH). This will be hard, but it will help the situation and you might have 2 cats that in the least will be ok with each other, GOOD LUCK !!!!